An elderly couple returned
to a Mercedes Dealership to find the salesman had just sold the car they were
interested in to a beautiful leggy blonde.
“I thought you said you
would hold that car till we raised the $75,000 asking price, said the man. Yet
I just heard you closed the deal for $65,000 to that lovely young lady there.
You insisted there could be no discount on that model.”
“Well what can I tell you? She had the ready cash, and just look at her, how could I resist?” replied the salesman.
Just then the young woman
approached the old folks and handed them the keys.
“There you go.” she said. “I
told you I could get this joker to drop the price.
“See you late grandpa.”
Never mess with the Elderly
Bill’s second Anniversary was coming up and if there was one thing that got his wife Suzy upset, it was not getting a thoughtful gift on a special occasion. Bill quizzed all his friends, co workers, clients and anyone he happened to bump into, as to what would be a good anniversary present. He finally settled on a huge bouquet of flowers. Not willing to trust himself to pick out the right flowers, Bill called up a local flower shop with strict instructions to deliver the biggest most beautiful bouquet of flowers first thing in the morning with the following note “Happy Anniversary Year Number Two!” The morning of the Anniversary Bill made sure Suzy would be the one to answer the door as he waited anxiously in the other room. “WHAT THE HELL IS THIS ALL ABOUT?!” Hollered Suzie angrily holding up his well thought out note, “Happy Anniversary You’re Number Two!”
The best form of birth control for people over 50: nudity.
Fifty is a powerful age for women. You can set off sprinkler systems with your hot flashes.
By fifty, you’ve figured out that time is a great healer and a not-so-hot beautician.
At 50 years old, life seems shorter. No point in spending it trying to make yourself disappear by dieting.
50 years old: In Led Zeppelin terms, that’s halfway up the stairway to heaven.
Turning 50? Laughter is the gift that keeps you in the present.